A Question of Faith

I know you guys don’t keep coming back for the ‘religious’ posts, so I keep them to a minimum.  I try not to work out my faith on the blog, it’s bad enough that you all think I’m a crazy cat lady, let alone a religious zealot…

I guess I’ve been around a few blogs written by Christians, and I have to be honest, some of them are sweet, schmaltzy, ‘pie in the sky when you die’ kinds of blogs.  Guess I’m not that kind of a Christian – or blogger… I also wonder whether they’re genuine or if they’re putting on a brave face for non churchy types.  A kind of ‘throwing out the welcome mat’ or ‘hey, Jesus makes your life brighter’ advertiser.

I’m afraid the whole Jesus thing isn’t actually an innoculation against ‘shit happening’.  Would be nice – it’s also true to say that working for the church isn’t necessarily a sweeter option than working in a secular workplace.  Mate, people are people wherever you go, they do stupid stuff, and they get it wrong both in church and out.  So it begs the question, why believe in all this stuff anyway?  I mean, what difference does it make if people behave no better for it in the end?

That’s a question that makes this post different than my orignal intent actually, but I’ll follow the muse… it’s worth answering, for my own benefit more than yours… so indulge me a little if you will, or flick back to the gratuitious cat photo.

I guess the context of these thoughts has been dissatisfaction at work/church.  I think it’s good to get a bit shook up now and again so you don’t get complacent about where you are and what you’re doing but I have to be honest it feels like crap.  Especially if you’re doing what you’re doing because of some ‘vocation’ or ‘calling’.  If all the material elements of your world are out of whack it causes you to call the spiritual elements in to question…

Further fuel for the muse is that there are a bunch of people in my world who are struggling, in all sorts of areas.  Real Life isn’t matching up to what they want out of it, who they are in it, or how they feel about it.  For some of them I want to shake them and say ‘enough is enough’  stop wallowing – bitter and twisted isn’t amusing or fun or the real you, the one we love…  you have the tools and the people around you and access to help…  sort it out…

For others I wish I could translate just how much of a difference a ‘real-life’ authentic experience of a real-loving, alive and powerful God made in my world and why I think it’s the beginning of the answer for them. 

And so I come full circle to the potential of a sugary schmaltzy post… which is the complete opposite of the God I know.  He’s full fight, balls on the line, down and dirty, dust up kind of a God.  One who’ll wade in full force to a situation when he’s invited, and while he’s that kind of beefy, solid solution he’s motivated by love.  His love is so all consuming that we can barely accept it… because our frailties are so embarrassing by comparison with his awesomeness…  However, he snorts in the face of our frailties.  His love covers all of them and more…

Arrgh… as soon as you say that ‘L’ word there’s schmaltz potential… but that’s what I’m talking about… this is love that puts on the gloves in defence, one that stands his ground, one that will defend our honour, our courage and who doesn’t quail in the face of our own very real weakness.  One who doesn’t see real life and go, "here’s my magic wand, let all the bad stuff disappear"… instead one who says, "I’m sorry, I know this sucks, but here, hold my hand, we’ll go through it together, see that light? See that Hope?  That’s me too… we’ll get there and at the other end you’ll be stronger, better, brighter and braver than you ever thought possible and you’ll be able to lead other people along this same path and help them see that light as well."

So here I am, walking out the other side of a pit,  still not sure about work, still not sure about my church and some of the people in it, still not sure we couldn’t do things SO much better… but sure of the one thing, the one person that I’m doing all this stuff for, the ONE who really matters.

That’s why I bother and it’s also why I am wishing I could translate that certainty so my troubled friends could be that sure, that confident, that peaceful and that hopeful for the present and the future too.