Ok. So it really was one moon last night, it’s just that I had the opportunity to see it repeatedly had I wished to and my exhibitionist neighbour certainly appeared to wish me to see his ‘glory’ repeatedly if the noisome attempts to attract my attention were anything to go by.

He was subtle about it, of course, because to actively shout out to me would not be seemly, But, coughs and throat clearings, heavy sighs and moving in and out of the security’s sensor to flick the light on and off also featured.  When I didn’t look up (I had noticed early on in the show when his back (thank goodness) was turned) he crossed the window in my kitchen to sit his (NAKED) butt down on my patio chairs.

To give him the benefit of the doubt I’ll go out on a limb and say it may merely have been that he was hot (only in the temperature sense of the word) as last night was particularly warm and humid. However, as he was outside for about an hour between the hours of 1 and 2 and as I was also up between those hours (fully clothed I might add) there did appear to be an element of ‘creepy’ about the whole situation.

I maintained an ‘ignorantly blissful’ demeanour the whole time. I noticed him early on and as such spent the hour ignoring him.  Once I’d finished my final Christmas preparations (at around 1.45) I turned out the lights, showered and went to bed.

At this point the Streaker (as he shall now be called) spent the next half an hour cruising outside my bedroom window.  Again, huffing and puffing, grunting (omg please don’t let me think about what THAT might have meant) and again, trying to elicit some response from me.  I ignored him, switched out the light, hung my rug against the window to block some of the flickering light from the security lamp, plugged in my earplugs and went to sleep.

So yeah, 2009 will go down in my history as not so much of the old ‘Silent Night…

or  Holy Night, for that matter…