It’s funny how a chance comment will stick with you, turning over in your mind long after the conversation is over. I can’t remember the exact words used but it was something like ‘that’s a very male response’ because rather than respond with sympathy to a situation, I’d offered a solution (my standard response – dr*gs baby, lots of lovely dr*gs).
I don’t think that my answer was right or wrong. It was what it was, but it got me to thinking about just how girly I am (or not) and why I may have responded as I did.
I’ve lived independently for 21 years now. That’s a long time to be looking after oneself and in not having anyone rely on to come up with the solutions a girl’s gotta look out for number 1 (much as it may pain her to do so at times). So, at first thought it would be easy to blame this independence for my answer.
It could also be because I don’t have the sympathy gene, (except where it pertains to sympathetic upchucking). My first response to someone taking a tumble in the street is to laugh… don’t get me wrong I’ll wade in to help, but will have to suppress a giggle as I do so and I will continue to giggle about it long after the fall.
In a similar vein I’m hopeless in the face of cases of ‘man-flu’ because I’m such a ‘get on with it’ kind of girl. High pain threshold, feel the burn and work through the pain (no, clearly I’ve never given birth) and if it’s good enough for me it’s good enough for those around me. Which sounds as though I’m a hard arsed, hard nosed beeeatch which is actually not true.
On balance it could all come down the fact that I’m a farmer’s daughter, bought up in a household where the man was hard and the woman, out of emotional safety, subjugated the princess to become a pragmatist. I’ve a strong dose of the pragmatist – a low tolerance for girly simpering and a high end practical bent. I can change a light-bulb, and a tyre without recourse to masculine help – and yes I can deal with spiders too. Bare Handed if need be.
Or it could simply be that I’m an ISTJ* who was doomed from birth.
Either way. Note to self.
Sympathy First.
(except in cases of obvious ‘man-flu’)
*terrifyingly accurate.
I’m with you. I giggle when I see others trip over, or hurt themselves in a comedic fashion. And, I’m a dreadful nurse when it comes to having a sick husband….. I wonder if I’m an ISTJ too…..
All I have to say is …. SNAP! (not necessarily about the ISTJ thing ’cause i haven’t done it … note to self etc … but about all the others stuff … especially the giggling)
INFJs have a hard time too. :)
And, being honest, us men are whingers when it comes to colds. :)
It’s h*ll being an ISTJ, isn’t it …