Kiwi to English Dictionary

Once upon a time there was a blogger called Morphess who curated this rather brilliant collection of Kiwi language idiosyncrasies. She quit blogging years ago, the blog languished in the vapour of the interweb and also in my archives as I was the technologist who looked after the site and kept it online for a while there.  She quit out of the blue, things went a bit tits up, I think, but her archives are still here (Caro, if you want them back, all you gotta do is email me)…

As a dedicated Kiwi myself I have decided that this list is far too good to be kept off the internet and as a consequence I’m posting it here.

Caroline, we miss your blogging, and if by some strange quirk you’re reading this and want me to take it down get in touch!!

Kiwinese.     English.

Sport.

Football     Rugby.

Soccer     Football.

Sport     Sacrosanct.

Half back     scrum half

First five-eighth     fly half

Sprigs     studs
Fat mans track     notional path up the centre of rugby pitch

Gumby    complete lack of coordination.

Miscellaneous.

Rumpus room    playroom

Wagging    missing school or work

Joker     bloke

Piker    someone who throws in the towel

Pit shop     Pet shop

Fairy     ferry

She’s a hard road    difficult

Judder bar    speed bump

Bach     holiday home, pronounced batch

Crib     holiday home in Southland and Otago

Sicktion     plot of land

Coaster     person from the West Coast of the South Island

Westie     person from West Auckland, associated with having a mullet.

A shocker    mildly disappointing

Woop woops    out in the sticks

Waikikamookau     fictional town way, way out in the Wop Wops.

Toyota     bugger. Long story to do with television advert.

Airgun?     How are you going? Greeting

Cocky    Farmer

Cow cocky     Dairy Farmer

Manchester     Linen.

Box of birds    O.K.

Box of fluffies    O.K.

Choice     O.K.

Sweet as    O.K.

Good as gold     O.K.

Stink     not O.K.

Onya     good for you!

Bro’     I’ve forgotten your name

Pun     Pin

Pin     Pen

Dairy     Corner Shop

Metal     Gravel
Yeah, yeah     Possibly

Paddock     Field

Dam     Pond

Number Eight Wire     Used for everything
Awesome     Average

Beer     bear (teddy)

O.E.     Get drunk in London pub with your Kiwi mates.

Glad wrap     cling film

Joker     man, not necessarily a funny one

Queer cattle     strange folk

JAFA     Just Another F*%&ing Aucklander.

Bush    Forest
Tramp    Walk
Rattle Ya Dags    Hurry Up

Hard Yakka    Hard Work

Turn To Custard     Go pear shaped

Grouse!     very cool indeed

Great Big Dick     Large Verandah

Sook     cry baby

She’ll be right.     I’ve just cut off my arm with a chain saw.

Apparel.

Togs     bathers

Skivvy     roll neck shirt

Swanndri     big coat/dress like thing. Much favoured for hunting and killing things in.
Gumboots     Wellies

Jandals     Flip Flops

Pants     Trousers

Food & Drink.

Trum mook    low fat milk

Hokey Pokey Ice cream    disgusting/delicious (depending on your tastes) vanilla ice cream with bits of Crunchie.

Bring a plate    ….with some food on it.

Chilly Bin     Cooler

Smoko     Tea break. And it’s illegal to smoke.

Supper     Late night snack

Lollies     Sweets
Chips     Crisps

Hot Chips     Chips

Pattie     Burger

Our Mate     marmite

Rice Bubbles     Rice Crispies

Weetbix     WeetAbix

Smokers     tiny, pink aniseed-flavoured sweets.

Colonial goose     stuffed leg of mutton.

Lemmincktons    lamingtons (vile cake)

Flet White     Cup of Coffee

Ice block     frozen juice on stick.

Do You Want A Wine?     Alcoholic beverage, not an excuse to talk about your mother.

Things not to say at a dinner party.
I met a really nice Australian the other day.

So, the English won the rugby.

Paul Holmes seems like a nice bloke.

I live in Auckland.

Did you see the cricket?
I’m so glad Michael Barrymore lives here now.

What’s all this about the foreshore?

With thanks to Jessie, Mike, Lil, Martin, Llew, Martha, Clods, Deirdre, Jono, Antipo, Flying Kiwi, HotnSpicy Kiwi, Duh-Mension, Fi and Deeleea.